Dollar Bin Horror Review:American Horror Story-Episode I-Pilot

By Eric Polk-
With the demise of  Smallville  and the V reboot, I'm left with only the venerable South Park as new t.v. I watch. So when FX teased us horror fans with American Horror Story, I prayed that I found a new show to add to my prime-time lineup.

American Horror Story follows the Harmon family, Ben (Dylan McDermott), Vivien (Connie Britton) and Violet (Taissa Farmiga), who move from Boston to Los Angeles after Vivien has a miscarriage and Ben has an affair with one of his students. The family moves to a decrepit mansion, unaware that the once noble home is haunted. Ben and Vivien try to rekindle their relationship while Violet suffers from depression.

In the debut episode, The Harmon family moves from Boston to Los Angeles to escape their painful past but find that their troubles are far from over. Psychiatrist Ben struggles to regain his wife Vivian's trust after he sleeps with a younger woman. Still recovering from a recent miscarriage, Vivian begins to sense something wrong with the house while dealing with intrusive neighbor Constance and her handicapped daughter Adelaide.When investigating the attic of the home, the couple find a "gimp" suit, this becomes important later in the episode. Daughter Violet starts at a new school only to be terrorized by a group of girls. Ben sees patients out of his home and one of them, an unstable and possibly psychotic boy named Tate  strikes up a relationship with Violet, but goes too far when trying to help with her bullying problem. Violet orders him to leave and not return, but it appeared that Tate may not have exceeded their plan but perhaps something in the home did. Vivien rehires the old housekeeper Moira whom Ben only sees as a young seductive maid. Ben and Vivian fight over their problems and end up making love. Ben is approached by Larry, a horribly burned former owner of Ben's new house who murdered his entire family. Larry warns Ben that if he doesn't get his family out of that house they will all die. Later Ben becomes obsessed with burners in the kitchen and appears to be heading towards burning the house down, similar to what Larry had done. Constance appears and stops him. Meanwhile, Vivian is in bed and is approached but what she believes to be Ben in the previously mentioned sex suit. Vivian and whomever/whatever is in the suit have sex.

Well, like an 18 year old with their first apartment, AHS goes way overboard. The S bomb is dropped more times than in Eminem's entitle catalogue. The first episode is drenched in unstimulated eroticism(I mean do we really need to see Dylan McDermott peel his chile?), soapy acting, and no suspense.

Other than the wife and the mentally-challenged girl, I find all these characters despicable, self-centered, and just plain one-dimensional. The gore is about as good as it gets for a basic cable show and I love the house. Hopefully, we will, in future episodes, learn more about the history of this house, and the people in it.