Monday, April 16, 2012

It Came From Netflix:Hellraiser-Revelations(2011)

By Eric Polk-
"I want to put on record that the flick out there using the word Hellraiser IS NO FUCKIN' CHILD OF MINE! have NOTHING to do with the fuckin' thing. If they claim its from the mind of Clive Barker, it's a lie. It's not even from my butt-hole."-Clive Barker

Yep. That pretty much sums up my feelings for this movie. So rather than waste time on yet another trash review of this cinematic equivalent of  an Orson Wells shitpile, how bout a recipe for orange chicken.

  • 2 lbs boneless skinless chicken , chopped into bite sized pieces
  • 1 egg 
  • 1 1/2 teaspoons salt
  • white pepper
  • oil (for frying)
  • 1/2 cup cornstarch, plus
  • 1 tablespoon cornstarch
  • 1/4 cup flour
  • 1 tablespoon ginger root , minced
  • 1 teaspoon garlic , minced
  • 1/2 teaspoon crushed red hot chili pepper
  • 1/4 cup green onion , chopped
  • 1 tablespoon rice wine 
  • 1/4 cup water
  • 1/2 teaspoon sesame oil

Orange Sauce for Stir Fry


  • 1 1/2 tablespoons soy sauce 
  • 1 1/2 tablespoons water
  • 5 tablespoons sugar

  • 5 tablespoons white vinegar

  • 1 zest of orange


  • 1
    Place chicken pieces in large bowl.

  • 2
    Stir in egg, salt, pepper and 1 tablespoon oil and mix well.

  • 3
    Stir cornstarch and flour together.

  • 4
    Mix flour mixture and egg mixture.

  • 5
    Add chicken pieces, stirring to coat.

  • 6
    Heat oil for deep-frying in wok or deep-fryer to 375 degrees.

  • 7
    Add chicken, small batches at a time, and fry 3 to 4 minutes or until golden crisp.

  • 8
    (Do not overcook chicken).

  • 9
    Remove chicken from oil with slotted spoon and drain on paper towels; set aside.

  • 10
    Clean wok and heat 15 seconds over high heat.

  • 11
    Add 1 tablespoon oil.

  • 12
    Add ginger and garlic and stir-fry until fragrant; about 10 seconds.

  • 13
    Add and stir-fry crushed chiles and green onions.

  • 14
    Add rice wine and stir 3 seconds.

  • 15
    Add Orange Sauce and bring to boil.

  • 16
    Add cooked chicken, stirring until well mixed.

  • 17
    Stir water into remaining 1 tablespoon cornstarch until smooth and add to chicken.

  • 18
    Heat until sauce is thickened.

  • 19
    Stir in sesame oil and orange zest if desired.

  • 20
    Serve over jasmine rice.


  • I recommend putting the cooked chicken on a cookie sheet and placing it in an oven at the warm setting while keeping the sauce, veggies, and rice in one pan or wok until done.

    We may never win a Rondo, but where else on any horror blog or website can you get this kind of useful information?

    2 comments:

    Tempest Nightingale LeTrope said...

    It isn't every day (in fact I don't think it's ever happened before) that a review can be shared both on the Hell's Pass 666-Plex and Virtual Buffet Facebook pages! This is truly a first.

    Retro-Zombie said...

    so am i not suppose to like the movie oh i am confused, but i am learning how to make orange chicken. yeah.... even though this movie is a pile of something as i have read i will have to see it, so i can make myself sick.